Submission

Red Spot II, Wallisy Kandinsky

Almost complete erasure,

her very essence

almost lost between the layers

he crafts with fine precision.

Complete submission,

she becomes his masterpiece,

his Dorian Gray,

absorbs his unbridled anger. 

Her blooded form

drips pigment on his palette,

becomes the red spot on his canvas,

she his unwilling lamb for slaughter.

Anna :o]

With thanks to Tess at The Mag for the inspiration and also the good folk at The Poetry Pantry at Poets United.

Burns Supper

Robert Burns

She fell in love upon first sight

Although indeed he knew this not

Her heart and soul he did excite

And at this supper and upon this night

Where honoured guest he did recite

The fine words of Rabbie Burns,

She hoped perchance she would catch his eye

And he entranced, her love would return.

He draws and cleans the knife

“His knife see rustic Labour dicht”

Plunges into haggis and cuts

“An' cut you up wi' ready slich”

She loves him so and distracted

By her deep emotion toys with the notion

That her love might not be unrequited,

For at the Toast To The Lasses

The men stand tall and raise their glasses

And he looks at her with recognition

As if he shares her intuition

That love is meant to be and he smiles,

And she now even more beguiled

Becomes a wee tim'rous beastie

Afraid he knows the thoughts within in her.

And much to her chagrin she blushes

Least he know that she is wanting.

Blood rushes from head to heart

And as she worships from afar

She begins to down the uisge beatha…

Ceremonies over, he walks to her table

His heart loved up for his mon amour,

And if he were able he would engage her,

But the silly Sassenach

Has downed too much whisky

And is on her back upon the floor.

He leaves her, this handsome brute,

His heart already broken,

His tears splash down and drown her with sorrow

And she racked with guilt

Was left with one blissful memory

For from the floor she could see up his kilt.

I was surprised to see that there was virtually nothing in blogland re Burns night as I tucked into my curried haggis and clapshot – yum yum!  I cannot claim Scottish ancestry but do love haggis and the Bard.

A history of the Bard can be found here, details of a Burns Supper here and listen to a recitation of “To A Mouse”  here.

Enjoy!

Anna :o]

With thanks to the good folk at  dVerse~Poets Pub Open Night.

Milestones to Adulthood in the Netherlands and Slippery Slopes

Compulsory education exists from 5-16.  From the age of 16 to their 18^th birthday children are obliged to pursue at least part-time education.

The age of consent to sexual relations is 16.

Children cannot purchase tobacco products until the age of 16.

The minimum age to buy wine and beer is 16 and 18 to buy spirits and hard liquor.  If a person is under 20 an identity card has to be shown before purchasing.

Children can enlist in the army at 17

Children cannot drive a vehicle until the age of 18.

Children cannot vote until the age of 18.

Children cannot marry until the age of 18, although they can with parental consent at age 16 and with permission from the queen if under 16.

The age of criminal responsibility is 12.

Termination of Life on Request and Assisted Suicide (Review Procedures) Act.

A patient of at least 12 years of age can request a termination of life (patients12-16 require the consent of their parents).

Slippery Slopes

Deliberate termination of life of newborns (involuntary euthanasia) with meningomyelocele (MMC) is practiced openly only in the Netherlands using the Groningen Protocol.

The Groningen Protocol is very controversial and as elicited papers such as ‘Deliberate termination of life of newborns with spina bifida, a critical reappraisal,” T.H. Rob de Jong (2007)

Isabel’s comment (Jan 19) to the previous post would suggest that the slippery slope exists here and that newborns – who fall outside the Groningen Protocol are terminated -  and I have no doubt that it is does.  I am certain that deliberate termination of life of newborns now covers more than those born with MMC and is unreported.

                                   …………………………………………

It would be foolish of me to infer that the rest of the world is squeaky clean in regard to the termination of children deemed to be handicapped and not worthy of life – for abortion allows this.  However is there a difference in terminating a life before or after birth?  What do you think?

Do you think a child of twelve and above has the maturity to decide that their life should be terminated especially as the Termination of Life on Request and Assisted Suicide (Review Procedures) Act has been given more scope including ““mental and psychosocial ailments” such as “loss of function, loneliness and loss of autonomy” as acceptable criteria for euthanasia. The guidelines also allow doctors to connect a patient’s lack of “social skills, financial resources and a social network” to “unbearable and lasting suffering,” opening the door to legal assisted death based on “psychosocial” factors, not terminal illness. The June 2011 position paper, titled “The Role of the Physician in the Voluntary Termination of Life” concludes that the “concept of suffering” is “broader” than its “interpretation and application by many physicians today.”

Included in a broader interpretation of suffering would be “disorders affecting vision, hearing and mobility, falls, confinement to bed, fatigue, exhaustion and loss of fitness,” according to the authors.

“The patient perceives the suffering as interminable, his existence as meaningless and—though not directly in danger of dying from these complaints—neither wishes to experience them nor, insofar as his history and own values permit, to derive meaning from them,” explains the KNMG position paper.

“In the KNMG’s view, such cases are sufficiently linked to the medical domain to permit a physician to act within the confines of the Euthanasia Law.”

“It doesn’t always have to be a physical ailment, it could be the onset of dementia or chronic psychological problems, it’s still unbearable and lasting suffering. It doesn’t always have to be a terminal disease,” said Dr. Nieuwenhuijzen Kruseman, Chairman of KNMG to Radio Netherlands Worldwide.”

Anna :o]

PS Can't 'understand' the sudden white background - blogs or me?

Assisted Suicides and Slippery Slopes

Termination of Life on Request and Assisted Suicide (Review Procedures) Act” (2002

Euthanasia and physician assisted suicide in the Netherlands is regulated by the above act.  Patients must meet specific criteria in that the patient has a terminal illness and requests (and this must be persistent and over time) a termination of life, has not been influenced by others, the patients suffering is unbearable and hopeless, the patient has been informed of and refused all possible alternatives (including treatment), has received the consultation of two physicians and has been made aware of the applied method of ending life.

However The Royal Dutch Medical Association has now released new guidelines widening the interpretation of the Act to include: ““mental and psychosocial ailments” such as “loss of function, loneliness and loss of autonomy” as acceptable criteria for euthanasia. The guidelines also allow doctors to connect a patient’s lack of “social skills, financial resources and a social network” to “unbearable and lasting suffering,” opening the door to legal assisted death based on “psychosocial” factors, not terminal illness.

” The June 2011 position paper, titled “The Role of the Physician in the Voluntary Termination of Life” concludes that the “concept of suffering” is “broader” than its “interpretation and application by many physicians today.”

Included in a broader interpretation of suffering would be “disorders affecting vision, hearing and mobility, falls, confinement to bed, fatigue, exhaustion and loss of fitness,” according to the authors.”

“Alex Schadenberg, Executive Director and International Chair of the Euthanasia Prevention Coalition committee responded to the new guidelines, saying that in his view “the expansion of euthanasia and assisted suicide has been constant and deliberate.”

Schadenberg warned that what has happened in the Netherlands can—and will—occur in other jurisdictions, if euthanasia and/or assisted suicide is legalized.

When the Netherlands sanctioned euthanasia for emotionally ill patients in 1994, Karl Gunning, head of the Dutch Doctors’ Union warned the country of the “slippery slope” it was sliding down.

“We have always predicted that once you start looking at killing as a means to solve problems, then you’ll find more and more problems where killing can be the solution,” he said.”

Charles Falconer’s ‘Commission on Assisted Dying’ (5.1.2012)

has concluded that there is a strong case for legalisation of ‘Assisted Dying’ and those that have twelve months or less to live should be allowed to end their own life/commit suicide.

The document is  here - it is a lengthy document – some 415 pages – and I have not read it all.  To summarise, the document suggests that to be eligible patients must be over eighteen years of age with a diagnosed terminal illness and less that twelve months to live, has made a voluntary choice and not been influenced by others, has mental capacity to make an informed choice and their decision making ability is not impaired by mental health problems such as depression, the patient is fully assessed to determine eligibility by at least two independent doctors, made aware of all options for treatment, care and support and still wishes to proceed and must be capable of administering the lethal medication themselves.

Author Sir Terry Pratchett (who jointly funded the so-called independent report) has stated that the report does not go far enough.

It is of a course a recommendation and there is no likelihood of ‘Assisted Dying’ becoming enshrined in law – yet.  Are we following the history of the Netherlands where certain assisted suicides became permissible in the 1980s, as in the need to clarify assisted suicide in 2009  in the UK?

The seeds for acceptance of legalised suicide are being sown, slowly but surely.  Lord Joffe has made four attempts during 2003-6 to introduce bills to legalise suicide and all were rejected by parliament.  Margo MacDonald’s “End of Life Assistance Bill” was rejected by the Scottish Parliament in 2010.

The drip, drip, drip is leading to a softening of opinion, indeed a “YouGov" poll commissioned by Sky News found 69% believe the law should be changed, compared to 17% who want it to stay the same and 14% who do not know.”

It is a fact that I understand that some of those suffering a terminal illness experience unimaginable pain and welcome death to alleviate this suffering – indeed when my own father was dying in such circumstances – initially I prayed (selfishly) to his God that he might live and upon realisation of his suffering prayed that he would die – quickly.  In hindsight – I wish to God that the Liverpool Care Pathway (LCP) existed then.

However – as those that have read previous posts will know – I have great reservations regarding the LCP.  Its admirable origins are firmly placed in alleviating the suffering of cancer patients diagnosed to be in the process of dying and yet its tendrils have spread to encompass all diagnosed (or thought to be) near death.  It is my opinion that the slippery slope exists here already and I know of occasions where it was initiated inappropriately.  To me the declaration that “The LCP is only as good as the people who are using it” is an acceptance that mistakes are made – for indeed the LCP is assisted dying.

During research I found myself confused as to what my true opinions/beliefs were, for as said I witnessed the awful slow painful death of my father and witnessed the same in residents in my home – this prior to the LCP – and then I have seen those diagnosed as near death living for years after.

I guess my epiphany was found at the Christian Medical Comment for I found much solace, much wisdom here – and I would stress that there is no conflict of interest as I am an atheist – and I thank Dr Peter Saunders for his communication – please read his wise posts on  euthanasia.    

I am concerned that assisted suicide will in the future be legalised in the UK – I am certain that it will (in time) – for just as the slippery slope exists in the Netherlands – it surely will happen here.

Before I sign off – please view this Dutch doctor’s experience as  the agent of death and consider that she states that she has no problems with assisted suicide and yet it emotionally affects her.

What say you on assisted suicide?

Anna :o]

Links:  http://witchdoctor.wordpress.com/2012/01/05/the-atheist-humanist-predicament-or-not/

          http://www.mercatornet.com/articles/view/the_new_year_should_begin_by_saving_lives_not_killing_them

PS  Had great difficulty creating links here - the post developed a mind of its own -  also messiness in its format and structure - can't correct it!          

Lonely City

Night sounds

Invade my solitude

And whip up wild imaginings.

No friendly chirp

Of cricket here

Or flirtatious croak

Of frog

But war drums

Of my beating heart

And panic supersedes

Rational thought...

Where are you?

With thanks to Tess at  Magpie Tales and the good folk at the The Poetry Pantry at Poets United.

Anna :o]

In Praise of Psychiatric Services? (2)

Dr Rant

I’ve just tried to change my password to ‘Community Mental Health Team’ but Facebook said: contains too many useless characters.  (Facebook 16/12/11)

Sorry Community Mental Health Teams  (CMHTs) – I find this to be true – well certainly in my neck of the woods.   God help the unfortunate soul who experiences an exacerbation of mental health ‘ishoos’ while residing in social care for they are truly lost!

I have written about this before and unfortunately nothing has changed.  The CMHT completely ignore us (staff) in that they do not seek our input, our knowledge and our concerns.  Liaison – what’s that?  Do they consult the referring GP (?) – I tend to think not (and indeed sometimes know) as GPs are equally frustrated re the lack of communication and cooperation between ‘colleagues’ and that (wrong) decisions are made (by the CMHT) after a thirty minute interview with the poor resident in question.

Ted entered our home some five years ago – he does not have any problems related to memory but that of depression and apathy which has dogged him since a traumatic incident in early adulthood.   He is isolated due to social anxiety which increases his depression and feelings of hopelessness and low self-worth. 

This has been his life for nigh on thirty years and increasing apathy, hopelessness led to Ted being at high risk of self-neglect and increasingly vulnerable to those in society who ‘befriend’ him and rob him of his benefits and thus him becoming a welcome resident of our home.  Our home is now his home.   (It is Ted's home - I/we have the privilege of working there!)

For some time Ted has become reflective re his personal situation and this in itself has led to a deeper depression (‘I am worthless’) and as he is comfortable in his home he is also able to express anger (‘I am useless!’) both verbally and physically (as in punching inanimate objects and destroying his own personal effects).

Ted has – for the first time – begun to self-harm.   He also exhibits behaviours that some might construe as sexual in nature – but to me (and I have discussed this with him) are an expression of his need to be loved and reverting to babyhood and the intervention required is to him, proof of caring.

Ted’s GP referred him to psychiatric services requesting the input of a psychiatrist.  In turn, said psychiatrist did not see Ted rather placing Ted’s future in the hands of the CMHT.   What is the purpose of the CMHT?   A CMHT meets the needs of people with mental health problems who don’t need a psychiatrist.

So it needs to be asked:  Does this little collusion of anonymity (psychiatrist and CMHT) have an agenda?    Why is the GP referral of secondary importance to that of the CMHT – who make their decisions based on a thirty minute interview without liaising with other interested professionals who know Ted?

The CMHT in their wisdom decided that Ted did not need to see a psychiatrist.  This decision – to Ted – was further evidence of his unimportance (‘Why is no-one interested in me?’).

Ted’s continued and deepening depression began to compromise his physical health in that he ceased to eat and had poor fluid intake causing an electrolyte imbalance which led to problems and the need for medication to counteract this.

Ted’s GP, who had long realised that Ted’s needs were beyond his expertise again contacted psychiatric services, pressing for the input of a psychiatrist and again this led to a swoop by the CMHT, who again decided that Ted did not need to be seen by a psychiatrist?

Six months ago, near death (malnutrition and dehydration), Ted was hospitalised.  He was at this time (finally) seen by a psychiatrist and when strong enough was transferred to a psychiatric hospital to treat his depression!

The psychiatrist contacted the home for a history of Ted and requested our thoughts – something the CMHT (and indeed the psychiatrist prior to this) did not!

It appears to me that the little collusion of anonymity ensured Ted paid a high cost both physically and mentally by denying him access to a psychiatrist – but that is what collusion of anonymity is all about – bouncing patients back and forth from one specialist/discipline to another with nobody taking responsibility for the patient as a person.

Ted is a person.

Before I close I would like to assure those who exist in CMHTs that this is a specific post to experiences in my neck of the woods and is not a gross generalisation of all.  I am sure that team members offer a vital hand to those in the community who do not need to see a psychiatrist.

Why do psychiatrists not take heed of GPs here?  Why in these instances are decisions left to CMHTs as to whether a patient requires the input of a psychiatrist – why does the psychiatrist not see the patient and make the decision him or herself?   Just wondering, that’s all…

What say you?

Anna :o]

Winter Feasts

Stripped bare

By autumns theft,

Skeletal now

Her frigid branches

Ache

To touch the warmth

Of rising Sol.

Dormouse, dormant

Curled deep

In winters sleep

Scratched out by

Hungry Fox.

Opportunist he,

He watches waiting

As Redbreast bobs

Through evergreen

Bearing

Seasons berries.

And distracted by

Her luscious feast of

Rich red rubies

Becomes easy fare

Feathers

On his winter table.

Jingle Poetry at Gooseberry Gardens prompt is:  Snow, December, Winter Vacations and Wildness.

Also posted re The Poetry Pantry # 80 at Poets United.

I must admit to being lazy and greatly slightly unprepared for Christmas, hence I have taken the easy way out and stolen an earlier (written in May)  post from t’other much neglected blog (Puzzelicious).

Merry Christmas folks!

Anna :o]

Change

Image by Mostafa Habibi

The boat,

the means of escape

is there. 

He could easily

step aboard,

cast off, set sail

and once afloat,

be free, unburdened. 

Does he? 

No.

He could go

yet always procrastinates,

always finds a ‘but’,

an ‘I can’t’

or ‘I’d better wait’

and buries himself

deeper

in the sand. 

He could go,

could leave the land,

but won’t cast off the burden

of his self-made anchor,

his self-made shackle.

He will stay stuck,

he does not want

the uncertainty

that change might bring. 

He will stay stuck,

remain the landsman

while gazing

longingly out to sea,

wondering,

“What if… …”

With thanks to Tess at  Magpie Tales for the inspiration.

Anna :o]

the cockroach catcher

‘The ability to dissect out a full set of cockroach salivary glands was a prerequisite requirement for medical school entrance in Hong Kong in our days.’

I purchased Dr Am Ang Zhangs’ book last November and placed it at the bottom of my ‘to read’ pile – I should not have done so.

Holidaying earlier this year – I decided that ‘the cockroach catcher’ would be my holiday read (even though it was still only half way up the pile) – it was a good decision.

Am Ang takes you on a fine journey from his poor beginnings in China to his education in Hong Kong, his life and experience at medical school, his decision to enter psychiatry leading to a post as registrar at The Tavistock Clinic  and to his role as a consultant paediatric psychiatrist within the NHS (and many interesting places in between). 

Dr Zhang had a common sense approach to the children in his care, intuitively finding the answer to their problems, cases ranging from sleep and toileting problems to those of anorexia, autism and psychosis - although towards the end of his career, red tape and ‘guidelines’ were to impact on his practice.

His book also gives insight as to how we as parents may influence the mental health of our children and how childhood is being medicalised when behaviours are due to lack of parental authority and/or guidance and are not psychiatric illness at all.

Although the back cover summary describes the book as a work of fiction, the contents are based on a good and a very real doctors’ journey through medicine.  It is a must read for all those either working in medicine or interested in child psychiatry and indeed childhood itself, and an invaluable read for parents who have concerns regarding their children’s mental health.

It is a fascinating well penned book with references documented in the footnotes and is available from  Amazon.  Visit the cockroach catcher here

Anna :o]

Freedom Of Speech?

Lunch, George Tooker (1964),
Columbus Museum of Art

When first viewing the fine painting opposite, there was not immediate inspiration and then I noticed the fellow at the bottom right hand corner.  Now he stands out as he appears to be thinking, whereas his colleagues appear to be to be lost in some awful blandness.

Viewing this scene reminded me of a post I had not long read at Bad Medicine and inspired, I wrote the below:

He Thinks

He thinks,

Therefore

He exists outside

The comfort zone

In which reside

Those who do not

Bend the rules,

Instead becoming

Slavish fools

To the dictates of those

Who profess to lead,

Control his every

Thought and deed.

He fights the system,

Will not conform,

Will not obey,

Become the norm,

Become a slavish automaton,

Where

Individuality is frowned upon

And freewill is all but gone.

………………………………

For those of you who do not read medical blogs, please visit BadMed and read Dr No’s post.   It deals with the aftermath of a particular ‘incident’ – I am not going to re-open an old wound, so visit blogs mentioned there and discover – which has led to a suppression of free speech.

You may notice that the majority of medibloggers in the UK do so anonymously and may wonder why this is.  Doctors are regulated by the General Medical Council (GMC), once led by the medical profession itself, but now a Government Quango and doctors are now very much policed.   In September the GMC held a poll in which opinion was sought as to whether the GMC should regulate doctors’ lives outside medicine.  How’s that for future policing?

Such is the power of the GMC, where independent thought is frowned upon, that doctors feel the need, the safety net of anonymous blogging.

Why do I blog anonymously?  For exactly the same reason, I love my job yet feel – quite strongly at times – that decisions are made (within the NHS); protocols initiated which actually harm patients.  I have a right, an individual freedom to say so, yet if I blogged under my own name – the nursing regulatory body (NMC) would consider I was bringing my profession into disrepute.

Fear is the driver of anonymous blogging.  Fear of losing ones livelihood. 

We applaud those brave souls who have fought for their freedom in the Arab Spring, yet at the same time are allowing our own freedom to be eroded.  Independent thinkers are being gagged and the gag is becoming tighter.  As illustrated in Dr No’s post – we are even gagging ourselves.

This erosion of freedom, the freedom to think for ones self is being eroded everywhere.  Look closely into aspects of your own lives, notice changes and be afraid, very afraid!

Anna: o]

With thanks to Tess at Magpie Tales for the inspiration.

***8/12/11   Interesting or worrying that the link to the GMC poll finds the page not found.  I wonder why that is then?***  (Link reestablished)

Red Sofa

photo: Christine Donnier-Valentin

I see you abandoned,

Now a street dweller,

As am I. 

You offer respite,

A resting place

For this footsore

World weary wanderer. 

I will sit a while.

I remember home. 

Brick walls

Rendered warm

With paint and plaster. 

Suzanne,

She and I

Made love

On one such as you,

Half-buried,

Deep in plump

Plush red cushions,

Candles flickered

Casting

Dancing shadows overhead,

Watching as we climaxed

In those wondrous moments.

Suzanne, I did love her so,

Even as I took another

Born in fields of tangled vine. 

She, the other,

Gave me succour,

Gives me succour,

Lets me sip her sweet red wine.

Rested,

I will leave you now,

Discard my memories. 

Pockets jangle,

Stuffed full

With buried treasure,

Pennies buried,

Laid long forgotten

Deep within your gaping innards,

Mined greedily by my hungry hands. 

I will court

My waiting lover,

Buy her wares, 

My ladylove

Resting in her bottle,

Suck hard

At her cold hard nipple

As she loves me,

Gives me succour,

Lets me sip,

Lets me taste

Her sweet red wine.

Anna :o]

With thanks to Tess at Magpie Tales for the inspiration.

Where Are All These Obese Women?

The media reported yesterday that the UK has the highest proportion of obese woman and the second highest proportion of obese men in Europe. It would appear that nearly a quarter (23.9%) of British women is obese as are 22.1% of men.

What I want to know is where the hell they are all hiding?

Logic would suggest that at least two (20%) out of  every ten woman I know are clinically obese, and forgive me obese folk, obese is big, not overweight, big and  I would notice – but I don’t because they are just not there (as in 20%)!  That said, I do know (and like) obese women, but totting up family members, friends and colleagues, obese women total 9.5% and overweight women 4.7%.  (I am overweight but have not included myself in this total – although that said I wear size 16 clothing which would suggest I am not overweight, yet my BMI suggests I am, and damn it I know I am!).

These figures (of course) only relate to my little circle of female comrades, whether they are family, friends or colleagues and are therefore not a true representation of female fattiness countrywide.  Yet, my wanderings in the mean streets of the city do not thrust this large population of large women in my face – I would notice – so yet again I would ask – where the hell they are all hiding?

I don’t trust stats and these stats are based on this report from the European Health Interview Survey.  The UK figures are based on this Health Survey for England, 2009 which clearly states in Main Topics that “The HSE 2009 was a short survey with a relatively small sample size….”

The questionnaire is here (pdf).   Scroll down to pages 44-8 which deal with height and weight and notice that reasons for refusal (to be weighed) are part of the questionnaire. 

So assuming that some will refuse to be weighed - and are not excluded from the survey (guesstimates used?) - the outcome must be slewed.  Whatever the case, this admitted small sample size has been extrapolated to reach a desired outcome?  And, and this is an important and, when this cross-section of the general public were chosen randomly to represent a true cross-section of the general public, how could ‘they’ know that this random selection did not include a disproportionate amount of obese people?

I will muse on the above while I eat enormous amounts of chocolate (don’t like it very much really) as I exercise by wiggling my toes.

Where are they all hiding?

(On a serious note, I do understand and appreciate that obesity is associated with many health problems and is not really recommended as a ‘lifestyle’.)

Anna :o]

PS  I don't know why there are strange gaps in the first paragraph - but I can't correct.  Maybe because my beloved comp is still not well?

10 Seconds

This (now amended) poem was first published on Poetry 24.  (Thanks Clare and Martin!)  Please visit Poetry 24 and contribute if you can.

The poem deals with the murder of Stephen Lawrence.

10 Seconds

Strength in numbers,

base mentality,

oh brave men they,

sick to the core,

they surround the enemy,

black face marks

his victim status;

Easy prey,

they pounce

(strength in numbers),

a punch, a kick, a knife,

that’s all it takes to snuff

a life.

He escapes,

runs for his life,

unaware that death

now lives within him,

He falls, bleeds,

heart stops,

life ceases.

Strength in numbers,

base mentality,

they watch him

flee and fall. 

Disinterested,

they leave,

as casually as they killed.

Link: Stephen Lawrence killed in ten seconds

Anna :o]

For those of you who do not live in the UK, please read the history here at Wikipedia.

For today's reporting please see this article in The Telegraph.

Let us hope that at this trial, Stephens family finally see justice done.


With kind thanks to the good folk at dVerse ~ Poets Pub for providing the opportunity to publish again.


Mmmm, mega PC problems, hence post a bit of a mish-mash.  Apologies!