Friday 25 May 2012

Blue

It is months since I thought
of decorating the hall
and I guess the stairs
and the landing too,
but when I attempt
to picture the finished wall
I always picture you instead
lain nestled in that empty bed.

The bed an empty tribute
(of a kind) to you,
the room a shrine,
your Rhapsody in Blue,
I never liked that you know,
you knew. 

Glissando  or portamento
I never really gave a fig –
that I ate today (well four)
with Weetabix, milk
and fromage frais,
But it’s important!,
you would say
as if it mattered
in the great big scale of things.   

I got weighed today
and knew I
would not want to know,
why is it that
my mind gets smaller
while my body grows? 
Middle aged spread
she kindly said
as I slipped back on
my cool alligator shoes
(that I wore when we danced
and you sang the blues).

I have the wallpaper
that will cover the cracks –
God I love you so
and I  want you back   
Tomorrow
 I will paste it, lay it
and paint it blue
(the colour I feel
when I think of you).

Anna :o]

Written for dVerse, the challenge being to write a Stream-of-Consciousness poem thus:

Choose a topic. You might think of a person, and activity or even a dream. Take a walk, go someplace public, and let your thoughts take flight.
Write with pen or pencil on paper. Draw pictures. You may even choose to use your writing journal to jot down your own little (schizophrenic) episodes.
When you write in your journal, be different. Write with your non-dominant hand, write all over the page, not just in lines, write from bottom to top. Write in spirals or shapes. Forget grammar and syntax.
Review your writing for any connection you can discover between words and phrases and see where your poem will take you.
Put your work aside for a while before returning to it.

Cheers dVerse!

26 comments:

Anna Montgomery said...

The atmosphere permeated, I felt engulfed in blue, this immersion worked so well. I also appreciated your post on mental illness resposted from another blog.

Daydreamertoo said...

Awww...how sad. I feel all of this. Losing love is not easy to do.
Lovely stream of thought.

Claudia said...

ha...that gave me some smiles along the way...had weetabix when i was in england...and all figs can't help that they taste good..hehe...love the alligator shoes - oh they fit so perfectly with the blues...what a lovely warm-hearted, bluesy write..

Victoria said...

I really like how you did this using the second person and throughout I wanted to know more about the "who" and the backstory. The colors and voice all add to the tone of the poem.

Brian Miller said...

some really great touches in this...like you questions...why is it that
my mind gets smaller
while my body grows?...smiles...one we all ask eh? and the aligator shoes, dancing and singing the blues...i found that evocative....nice...

drerhumu said...

Its amazing how little objects, colours or sounds can bring back memories of someone that has had great impact on our lives.

adan said...

nice the way the stream wraps itself back onto itself, rejecting the missing lover's likes, but willing to re-place those same items, if the lover were to return, all tied to variations of "blue" - very nice ;-)

esp liked,

"why is it that
my mind gets smaller
while my body grows?"

i know the feeling/sight ;-)

Anonymous said...

You weave the current and past so well here. Lovely poem. k.

hyperCRYPTICal said...

Thank you for your very welcome comments folks.

Anna :o]

kaykuala said...

So many things and items fall into place to bring back the memories. You cleverly brought back the yearnings for a loved one beautifully! Great write, Anna!

Hank

Bodhirose said...

I like how so much was centered around the missing of someone from your life..so many times our thoughts become immersed in memories..or pining.. Greatly enjoyed this.

Gayle ~

Dave King said...

Oh, this is so clever - and a lot more than clever. I love the allusions and the way the feelings are conveyed on two levels.

Mary said...

I understand how you feel...so much sadness seems to be all around when you lose the one you loved. So many reminders, and they all hurt!

always, K. said...

Paint it navy with warm undertones and woodwork,
woodwork
- make it slightly ivory.

And bulbs, bulbs should be 'sqiurrel's cage', raw.

It's always dark in your in-the-middle. Whiteness of railings will lead you safely.

Friko said...

The things that come up when we let our thoughts ramble. A lovely meander in blue.

Luke Prater said...

very enjoyable reading your stream... you have a fascinating mind.... Wolff would be proud

mrs mediocrity said...

this is lovely... a fabulous flow and mix of the emotions that come to mind when we think about love...
"Middle aged spread
she kindly said
as I slipped back on
my cool alligator shoes
(that I wore when we danced
and you sang the blues)."
Big smile on that one...

MIFFY said...

This made me,
THINK,SMILE,
REMINISCE.

Anonymous said...

Oh man- thus was so nice - amazing to see your thoughts spilling down this piece- but all interlinked with naturally linking and very skillfully placed rhythmic intonations. The subject had a distinct melancholia- lost love or longing...and reminiscing in those tangible objects that create emotion...totally enjoyed this ....I

Jenny Woolf said...

Oh, this is marvellous. And it would make a terrific song.

hyperCRYPTICal said...

Cheers folks for your very welcome comments.

Anna :o]

Anonymous said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Anonymous said...

Superb tone...every detail built a reality.

Luke Prater said...

great blue ambience created here Anna. All-pervasive.

Daoud Alahmad said...

Fascinating and expressive thank you

Ursula said...

Whenever I dip into your site, I end up meandering and getting lost - admiring the sentiments and the turns of phrase.

"why is it that
my mind gets smaller
while my body grows?"

Delightful! Though, I hope my mind is expanding - at least at the same rate as my waistline!