Monday 11 June 2012

Earth Man: Genesis


Still Life, 1670, detail by
Jean Francoisde La Motte

Willow weeps her tears of sadness,
they bitter with the pain of parting
burn hot and deep driving her to lonely madness,
course, rage through her very vessels,
sear and burn her broken heart.

In yonder forest he earth emerges,
flesh made of mud,
cold heart rough hewn from stones,
precipitation is his lifeblood,
twigs and branches make up his bones.

Willow cannot cope with his rejection
and deeply wrought in her dejection
rips out his letter affixed to door by nail and band
and reads the words of her amour.

His heart is made of stone,
yet devoid of all emotion
he does not wish to be alone,
will seek out the lonely in their shadows,
needs to make their beating heart his own.

She reads his words in lonely anguish,
tears splash down and blur, stain his missive,
she yearns for his love, his smile, his kiss, if
only he would return again…

Trembled the stars
that devilish night the earth man sought her,
(he would steal her heart as he slyly court her);
fashioning his face to that of her amour,
he gently taps upon her door.

She sees him, heart dances to her head,
his lips brush hers (she tastes the strangeness)
as he lifts her up, takes her to her bed. 
(Uncertain of his new persona
she mentions not the change less
he again should leave her…)

Noticing her reserve he does deceive her,
bluffs his way into her heart,
says that his leaving let him grieving
and he knows they now should never part.

Her flesh did crawl as she let him love her
as in her heart she knew he was another –
but ‘twas too late as he now did own her…

Stepping into the night
lit bright by moon and its corona,
stars trembled as she walked cold beside him,
knowing that her heart did beat inside him,
fate sealed in that first earthy kiss,
evolving earth man genesis…

Anna :o]

With thanks to Tess at The Mag for the inspiration and also brenda w at The Sunday Whirl (wordle 60) for her inspiration too!

24 comments:

drerhumu said...

Great use of metaphors!

Brian Miller said...

nice....love your storytelling...it reminds me of tales of old, his deception as well, a bit of sadness for if that is on which it is based, it is surely doomed....nice rhyme scheme as well...

brenda w said...

Anna...love the rhythm and rhyme, and your use of the wordle words. This was an engaging read. I enjoyed it. So glad you are writing for The Whirl!

Little Nell said...

Oh I liked this Anna! I thought exactly the same as Brian, and it reads like something from the ‘noble tales’. Welld one too on incorporating those Wordle words.

Tess Kincaid said...

I love this...I always have a strong connection to anything "willow"...beautiful...

Anonymous said...

oh love this gorgeous fairy tale,
designed to make women swoon and wonder. so visceral and roughly
romantic.

Elizabeth said...

Really good use of both prompts. Good tale of romance and mystery,

Elizabeth

S.E.Ingraham said...

Brava - you've done a masterful job of weaving both prompts together here and I love the story as well ... very beautifully told

http://aleapingelephant.blogspot.ca/2012/06/black-webbed-claw.html

Jules said...

'Her flesh did crawl as she let him love her as in her heart she knew he was another – but ‘twas too late as he now did own her… '

Ah but who did create 'the man' -
How many poor maids are left walking heartless... Nice tale indeed.

Thanks for your visit and kind words.

Daydreamertoo said...

Oh very, very nice. He fooled her into making love and now she belongs to him. How sad. Maybe that's why it's called a weeping willow.
Really enjoyed this!! :)

teri said...

So she fell for it; I know that story. Hopefully she can pull herself together. And sometime down the road give that guy a shove- right back into the mud where he came from.

Thanks for stopping by my place. :-)

Marianne said...

Wonderful story-telling and great use of the wordle words!

hyperCRYPTICal said...

Thanks for your welcome comments folks!

Anna :o]

Tigerbrite said...

I enjoyed this mysterious tale of woe. Nicely done.

Friko said...

I'm not sure, is this funny or melodramatic? Or both? On the whole I go for funny.

hyperCRYPTICal said...

Thanks for your comments Tigerbrite and Frilo.

Friko: melodramatic of funny? Not quite sure - just something that popped out of my peculiar mind!

Also apologies to the many poets who I have not visited - sometimes real life gets in the way of blogging...

Anna :o]

Scarlet said...

Enjoyed the creative take, using nature as metaphor ~

May I just request one thing - if you can make your font bigger, so its easier to read?

Thanks for sharing your talent ~

Other Mary said...

Oh very eerie! And beautifully told.

Luke Prater said...

Interesting tale you weave. Has an old feel to it. Enjoyed, thank you!

Luke Prater said...

along to see if you have anything new... : )

Anonymous said...

Hey Hyper, I just wanted to say Thank You for Following "The Dark Globe"... It's June Follower Appreciation Month over there, you should Check it out

DarkJade-

Misterio Vida said...

mesmirizing tale as always, you are a pro :) thanks for such an enthralling piece... have a nice week...

hyperCRYPTICal said...

Thank you for your welcome comments folks - much appreciated.

Anna :o]

website design adelaide said...

Hi Anna. I so love this. It tells the the hardship that comes into a relationship. We'll encounter the dark side of falling in love and at the end we'll be able to conquer it.